There seems to be a common topic going around the blogosphere of late. The topic of feeling as if you are not enough, coming to the point where you realize on your own you are not enough, and discovering that by GOD's grace, and in HIS eyes, you are enough for HIM.
I am not going lie. The feeling of not being enough, whether it be for GOD, my husband, peers, it's plagued me my ENTIRE life.
I'm shy, and introverted. Always have been.
As a child and then a teenager, that caused me to be a target of emotionally, gut wrenching, verbal bullying.
No matter how hard I tried, I was never fully accepted for who I was. And the older I got, the searing pain and fear of rejection, caused me to retreat ever deeper into my shell.
But, praise GOD! HE has healed those injuries.
Unfortunately though, that sort of pain has left some pretty deep scars. And to this very day, I struggle with opening up with others, trusting them, and sharing the person GOD created me to be.
At times I have found myself longing to be accepted so much, that I will not express who GOD has created me to be. Who HE is training for a special purpose in life, that only HE knows about.
I lose my voice. I restrict showing how HIS spirit is working. And that stifles that great work.
That great work of being fearfully and wonderfully made in HIS eyes. The one whom HE has made me to be.
The 24 year old, sinner, that is oh so thankful to be saved by grace.
The one who fails her LORD and Savior miserably on a daily basis, and is blown away by HIS never ending mercy and forgiveness.
The one that has undergone so many trials, and by HIS grace alone, has for the most part become reliant on HIM alone.
The young woman that loves hunting, and getting her jeep muddy.
The girl that has a passion for weight lifting, running, herbal healing and eating healthy, but ain't gonna hesitate scarfing down chocolate cheesecake.
The worrier, the bossiest ever, laugh way too loud at ridiculous things, and cry at the drop of a hat kind of person.
The wife who feels as if she loves her husband too much at times, and desperately longs to be a mother.
And how wrong it is to hide whom GOD created, and is creating me to be.
I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. Psalm 139:14
By GOD's saving grace, I am enough.
By that grace, and HIS never ending strength, I will overcome the fear of not being enough, and the sin of hiding who HE has created me to be.
Is the LORD teaching you that you are enough for HIM? Have you ever had to overcome the pain and fear of rejection? What encouragement did the LORD bring into your life?
Have a wonderfully blessed day everyone! Thanks for stopping by!
Angel
P.S. The post by Arabah Joy, titled "Dear Underdog, How to Be On Top" heavily inspired these thoughts. As well as...
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Loved the part about being into herbal healing and healthy living but also eating cheesecake! I'm that kind of person too. :) I though this was a lovely post!
ReplyDeleteThank-you Tiffany! It's encouraging to hear I'm not the only one! :D
DeleteI LOVE this post. I have had many of the same struggles - Satan knows how to toy with my most vulnerable areas! God's grace is an amazing gift, and coming to terms with His acceptance being all we need is so amazingly freeing!
ReplyDeleteAmen Julianne! It truly is freeing. :)
DeleteI can echo this so much. Why does Satan delight so much in telling us to strive for more? Believing God's grace and truth in this is so freeing but oh what a battle it is. Love your shirt too. :) (and thank you for linking me!)
ReplyDeleteThank-you, and you're welcome! :D A battle it really is.
DeleteAngel, I loved this!! I can echo al of your thoughts as my own. I had such a hard time from middle school till early adulthood (I still struggle!). But I can rejoice and repeat your words, I am enough. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. And through GOD's great love I can be me!
ReplyDeleteThis was delightful.
And thank you for linking to me ... I praise GOD that my post was a blessing to your life. :)
Thank-you and you're welcome also! :D It's a blessing you found this delightful.
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